Song to the Child

Dedicated to the heart and memory of Maria Graciela.

 

PSYCHOLOGICAL/SPIRITUAL PERSPECTIVE

What is this soul longing for?
What does this body need?

“It is no small matter to acknowledge one’s yearning. For this many need to make a particular effort at honesty. All too many do not want to know where their yearning is, because it would seem to them impossible or too distressing. And yet yearning is the way of life. If you do not acknowledge your yearning, then you do not follow yourself, but go on foreign ways that others have indicated to you. So you do not live your life but an alien one.”                                                                                                                      – The Red Book by Carl Jung</em>

At 40, she was tired.
She hadn’t gotten the life she wanted.
It had not turned out the way she planned.
Something was stuck inside.
That made it unsafe to be and share her Great, Feminine self,
To yearn, to desire.
To celebrate pleasure.
Something was stuck inside.
That made it difficult to accept the good that others might be able to offer,
At least for long.
She carried a great burden.
She had no idea how to be the way she wanted to be.

We can now hear you,
Maria Graciela,
Saying what no one else could:
You had withdrawn your heart
from your life.
This song
In Three Parts
I sing from my heart to
Your Soul
And from my heart to my soul.
An infusion of love.
The milk of our mothers’ breasts that we needed
And didn’t get.

Part 1 – Coming In
Being
On the outside
For the very first time,
In that eternity that is
The first five hours of my life disconnected
From my mother.
My swollen gray eyes,
my wrinkled face.

An eternity
Imprinted
By the plastic cradle
Lifelessness on my soul.
Bright lights.
Smell of disinfectant.
Harsh sounds.
Distant voices.
Where is the heartbeat?

Where?
Can you see me?
Can you hear me?
Do you believe in me?
Where is the connection
I have come for?
Does love exist for me?

Being
Seen.
By my mother
For the very first time.
Her dull eyes,
Gray face
Struggling her way back to herself.

When she comes back
To herself
I can have
What I yearn for.
I feel it for a moment.
I love you my sweet little baby girl.
You are a beautiful miracle.
A gift from God.
I will always treasure you.

But in place of the breast is a rubber nipple
That was never designed
To provide what I need.
Connection
Presence
Touch
A warm, relaxed mother,
And Her Lifegiving Nectar.

Now she divides her time
Between three with needs
That supersede her own.
Determined to do
All she can,
To be good enough,
She becomes
A human doing.

Does she allow herself to sit for a while
To rest
To offer her warmth
To gaze into the glistening gray eyes
That have just arrived
From the other side?
To enjoy the sweet, magical moment for herself?

Will she gift herself with that sweet, tender moment?
Or do a million little things
Keep her separated from her soul?
Her instincts
And the pleasure
That a moment with me,
Her infant child
Holds.
(Adapted from Suzanne Norton)

Part 2 – Seven

At seven she is carrying a great weight,
Responsibilities that don’t belong to her.
But she submits.
She has no control of her surroundings.
Her shoulders are bowed.
Telling the world
What she dare not know, herself.
Standing this way protects her heart.
She’s protecting herself almost like a turtle.
She hides her resignation and fear safely inside the shell.
Nobody wants to hear or know about those.
Or has the time
To give them the care they need.

Part 3 – Enough

Powerful Woman,
You now have permission to create.
To devour the arts,
The sweetness of Life.
To learn and explore.
Loving and abundant.
You grow from within.
Nourished by the energy of desire.
Your destiny is inspiration.
Life around and in you.
Spark. Love. Energy.

Harbor no fear.
Your body will rebound.
It will respond
To Your love, Your warmth.
There is energy enough to fuel
All you yearn for.
There is time enough for sweetness
For the connection you desire.
It is all around you.

The Universe, Your eternal Mother, has been here all along.
She has not left you
Even for a moment.
Open now to the flow of life.
Open and soften the heart.
Put down the shell.
The hard defenses.
Relax.
There is nothing to fear.

Accept your true greatness.
Receive the love all around you.
Only then will you be able to share it!

You have the guidance you need
To work through the muck and mire in your soul.
And you are worthy
Of the time and energy it takes.
You are worthy of love and pleasure.
Of gentleness and safety.
You have such unique value
In this world
That it would be a true tragedy
To waste another precious moment
Doubting.
You are worthy of love and nurturing and acceptance.

It is correct to want, to yearn for something your heart desires.
To yearn for what pleases and delights you.
You are allowed to have what you desire.
Go ahead.
Ask.
Take the chance.
And believe, once more.

Listen for what calls to you,
Notice what makes you come alive.
Reach. Yearn.
Dare to desire.
And Receive.
Without fear.
Be the Woman you are.
Be
The exquisitely attuned
Receptor of Pleasure
That you always were.

A heartfelt thanks to my friends, known and unknown, on Facebook,
which include the angels in the list below:
Thank you for your generous gifts and wisdom.
With your acts of sharing and kindness you have helped me and others
to understand what this pattern is saying, so that we can better care for ourselves.

Contributors:

Valerie Trower
Diana Barragon
Susan Franck
Chad Jason Mast
Chad’s Friend
Susan Blue
Julie Barry
Katherine Froeschle
Nirtana Goodman
Kandice Grossman
Kimberly Kinnard
Mahadevi Prem
Tami Brunk
Tracy Barnett
Chris Wells
Iris Rodriguez
Manel Mirendah
Jeannie Watson
Jackie Noel
Leslie J Yerman
Suzanne Norton
Janae Weinhold